What is art? It's fucking over, that's what.

Well, that's it. I have finished my Art A-level.

Shit.

I'm not sure if I'm relieved or upset. Probably a combination, I did feel slightly strange leaving the art room without my folder. And again on the bus when I had a slight panic attack because I thought Id' forgotten it.
I think overall, I'm looking forward to being able to draw whatever I want, whenever I want. As opposed to having to stick to a subject, making sure I do my artist research, experiment with media and finally link everything together before carefully explaining why I did it.

Well, that's one in the bag, as my Dad said this morning.

On a completely unrelated note, a couple of my friends went downtown the other week while Claire Perry was parading up and down the high street harrassing the innocent public. Of course she was far too important to introduce herself, so leaping out in front of them and exclaiming 'Hello! It's me! Got any questions?', seemed far more appropriate.

And professional.

And not at all arrogant.

But I suppose that encounter reflects the mentality of politics. It's like I was discussing with a friend just after the election, the whole thing is like some weird card game, where you have to play stratigically if you want your party to stand a chance. Because we're in such a Conservative area, our votes count for virtually nothing, and our best bet is to hope for a hung parliament. At least then the Lib Dems would get some say in the whole matter.

Anyway It's over with now, and hopefully we will end up with Tory/LibDem.

Also today me and J were in Azuza, and we came across possibly the most pathetic, heart-wrenchingly pityful picture of Gordon Brown ever (EVAR). It almost convinced me to change my political views it was that sad. He looked like a poor, lost, jowly, wrinkly puppy.

So to conclude: I should definitely get novelty nerd glasses

'Bloody Bastards!'

To be honest, I've never thought that I was particularly good at expressing myself verbally.

I'm more of a physical person.
I'm more competitive at physical things.
Be it mud wrestling, blinking contests, arm wrestles... but especially drawing.

Drawing is something I'm truly hot headed about. If I'm going to be completely blunt, I would say I fucking rule at drawing, but it's one of the few things I'm genuinely good at.

So if I see someone who I precieve to be better at or even as good as me at drawing, I get very...

very

very

jealous.

Which is pathetic really.
The point is, my Art exam is this week. It's fifteen hours long, spread over three days, and it's actually quite fun. Although we aren't allowed to leave the room except for lunch and long break, and we're not allowed to eat or listen to music, it's still pretty fun. For my final piece, I'm doing an A2 sized drawing, just in pencil. Nothing fancy like charcoal (wooo).

Even so, I know I've been pretty snappy the past few weeks at certain people. So if I caught you with my extremely short fuse, don't take it personally.

It's probably due to the fact that I am kind of pressured to make amazing and magical things happen using only pencils, and until two days ago, I had literally NO IDEA what I was going to do in my exam. But I'm okay now. Might still look like a wreck tomorrow and the day after due to lingering cold and lack of sleep (ironically not due to stress, but to late nights watching Greenwing). So if you catch me motionless in a chair, I'm probably just napping, and not dead.

Also, is it just me or do everyone else's parents really latch on to any mistake you make once youve been accepted to university?

The other night for example, me and my Dad were dicussing accommodation. He asked me to bring down all the leaflets and information I had.

I forgot ONE booklet, and suddenly I won't be able to 'survive' at uni.
Or like that time I burnt a potato. Like, it wasn't even burnt. Slightly crispy.

WHICH IS HOW I LIKE IT.

If you do, for some reason, want to see my art: go here.
I'll warn you, it's not for the faint hearted.

1755

Oh my gee! Only ten more posts until my 100th. What shall I do for it? A special thing? That appears to be all the rave.

Today in my Art lesson, my Art teacher said I have 'such talent'. Made my day. It's just nice to hear from him after he constantly goes on at me for not having enough ideas. It's not my fault if i feel repressed by the system.

I have learnt to play Faust Arp by Radiohead from the album In Rainbows. I'm very pleased with this, because it means that I can now play four songs from that album all the way through (Nude, Faust Arp, Reckoner and Jigsaw Falling Into Place) which I know doesn't sound like a lot, but they are pretty fucking hard.

Well, sort of. Two of them were hard to learn. I suppose that means I have to learn the whole album now. That's cool, I'm down with that.

Also today, in my English Language lesson, we were given a fun (read: not actually fun, I fooled you all) quiz. First question was 'when was the first version of the english dictionary published?'. I wrote down my answer, J wrote down hers. Then we exchanged a look of smug contentedness before nodding wisely. Like the wise owls we secretly are.

14 days of Procrastination

Once again, the last day of the holidays will be my most productive.
At the start of every half term, I always say to myself, 'This time, I'll do all my work straight away, I will not leave it to the last minute. Oh yes Bob, no mad rush at the end for me this time, I'm sidestepping that landmine...'

And yet here we are on the last day of the holidays at 11:16am and I still have two essays, endless amounts of Art, Psychology research and immediate revision for a timed English essay tomorrow.

But on the other foot, the weather has been most splendid for the past few days, and I have had a great holiday. Last Wednesday I met up with J and two other friends who we hadn't seen in a ridiculous amount of time (For the sake of tradition and continuity, I'll call them E and B). It was amazing to see them again, we hung around at J's for a bit eating jelly sweets before heading out to Pino's for a Pizza and drinks (actually, E ordered the pizza for himself, and despite complaints of feeling sick he ate most of it). When we got back we watched J's Michael Mcintyre DVD, while I tried to teach B how to make triangles out of Starburst wrappers. He was actually surprisingly good. He also said next time we meet up he'll bring his guitar and teach me to play Tender by Blur.

At the end of the night we all hugged goodbye with promises not to leave it to long before we next meet up.

Thursday I went round to a friend's with various people including SBHx. To summarise we basically played poker and poole and I stole everyones wine then kissed SBHx again.

To be fair, it was a Dare. But it's not like I need that excuse.
We soon ran out of ideas for Dares, so it turned into a very intimate game of Truths. Started off with things like 'If you could date/be stranded on an island with/ marry any celebrity, who would it be?'

For me, anyone who tried to ask that question only got as far as 'If you could marry any-' before I shouted 'John Simm'.

Serisouly guys. At least make it challenging.
It eventually turned to more personal inquiries. Which, I'm not going to mention unless I want to be un-followed by everyone who was there and reads this blog.

And also most of the guys who Follow me.

Well I suppose that's enough of a post to make up for the way I deprived you all of my blogging.
I'll try and get into the swing of it again. Soz.

AW MAN

I had a really good blog about how Psychology is a real science, because I'm sick of all the narrow minded twats claiming that it's a hollow subject full of "guesswork" (see here).

Well it got deleted when my internet died.
So you'll just have to cope with this non-blog.

It's a real science you SHITS!

Boringgg

I literally have nothing new to say.
But I know that some people are undergoing various levels of distress due to my lack of blogging.

Well, a few days ago I watched 'District 9'. It was good, I liked it.

No, I'm not going to review it, fuck you.

I've been spending most of my evenings drawing aimlessly. Trying 'futilely' to link my pointless doodles to my art topic. Sometimes I scare myself with my warped creativity, seriously. I barely pay attention to what I'm drawing and then when I next properly focus on the page, I'm genuinely concerned for my sanity.
No, not really they aren't that bad. If you're an arty person you'd probably grasp the underlying concept. Probably.

I'm also trying to convince my Dad to let me stay at home while him, my stepmum and my sister go to Lanzarote. I'm not sure what date it is exactly when our A-Level results come out, but I know for a fact that I would be abroad when they do. Stepmum saw it as only an inconvenience: I can just lounge on a sunbed working on my tan when results day comes.

NO.
Unacceptable. I don't want to find out whether my plans for the next three years of my life will fall into place by TEXT. And if I dont get the grades I need I have to go through clearnance anyway, and I would have to at least be somewhere with an internet connection.

So screw them I'm staying at home. Also, if I were to go, I would leave on the 14th, which is the day J gets back from Amercia. It's like the icing on the cake of shit timing.

14th.

So I made it through the worst part of Mother's Day without vomiting or accidentally punching anyone in the face.

I hate Mother's Day.
I hate even just saying 'happy Mother's Day' and having to smile as if I geninely mean it. I hate having to hug her, she still feels like a stranger even after nine years.

As far as I'm concerned, she has been far from a Mother to me or my sister. So basically, today is just one lie after another:

'Happy Mother's Day'
'I hope you like your presents'
'I'd love to make you tea'
'I hope you don't accidentally inhale it and choke to death'

It's all bullshit anyway. Most of these holidays are; Valentines Day, Mother's/Father's Day, Christmas. All commercialised, all skin deep.

Today is just another painful reality check. Not just for me, but for my Nan especially. She lives in Stockton-on-Tees, near Birmingham. We see her once a year, but I'd like to see her more.

Basically, her daughter died of breast cancer, and then a year later her son died of a heart attack. So I call her alot whenever I have the chance, and I send her letters. I can't imagine what she must go through today.

So for some of us Mother's Day is a pleasant reminder of how much we love and appreciate our Mums. For others it's just a slap in the face.

Aaahh depressing blog sorry!
On the bright side, yesterday I got Sara the most awesome T-Shirt ever.
And in 45 minutes I'm going to see 'Alice in Wonderland'

With my Stepmum, but you can't win them all ;)