What the ELL?!

Omg what the eff is with all these effing spiders???
For the love of John Simm! (who is coming back to Doctor Who at Christmas [I love him])
Just now, I turned around while I was in the bathroom to pick up my T-Shirt and there was a ginormous crooked spider sprawled along the skirting board.

So for some reason I started humming 'Space Oddity' by Bowie before slowly backing out of the room.

Then I ran off to tell my sister who grabbed one of the many cardboard tubes she keeps in her room for some reason and smushed it to death (I still hummed 'Space Oddity').

It took her a few goes to get it, because she refused to actually step in the room. You know, in case it charged at her and wrestled her to the ground. I was watching from a safe distance and mostly heard exclamations such as 'God *thump* shit, shit *thump* fucking die! *thump thump thump thump* erugh .....................*thump*'

She put a little cardboard box thing over it because it had died in a really twisted position and it was a bit gooey, so neither of us felt like picking it up.

I hope my step mum picks up the box and finds it. That'll learn her for being so short and annoying.